Installation of infusion port

Finally after so many weeks of postponement because my wound did not heal may surgeon told on 22nd of October : "Tomorrow we will have the operation." As I confessed before I am really a coward and even if I wanted it done ,I was afraid so I asked if we may postpone it for a week more.
And my doctor said:"Hey you can certainly work on it - develop a fever by tomorrow morning, otherwise it is a date, I will see you tomorrow in O.R. ".
So yours very truly found herself at 8:00 AM in the hospital. After all the new paper work only at 10:30 petrified Katie was wheeled into pre-operation's room where they give you anesthesia. I was worried for the nurse because she had to get a sedative in my vein; and as I told you there are no veins, but somehow she managed on the first try and I was relaxing and did not know what was happening when I was rudely awakened... I was taken to recuperation room, given some food and discharged.
I love the discharge instructions: no driving, no shower for the first 24 hours, but sex is OK!!!
I have to tell you that anticipation is a lot more stressful than the real thing. I did not experience any pain during the operation and after it was manageable, I did not take any painkillers. The day after the operation there was a telephone call - my surgeon called himself to find out how I was feeling and if I was in any pain. Let me tell you I was touched, because as far as I know very few doctors do that. No wonder I have a crush on him... Who would not be-a dashing trim fellow in blue operation overalls.
Now the second waiting game starts; my incisions (there are two) have to heal before they both (the surgeon and oncologist) allow me to have chemo therapy. But I am quite patient; like in the operation room I say "God do what and when you think it is right". So consciously I do not worry, but for some reason I can not sleep... Interesting, ha!

Humor

I always thought that in order to survive in this world in one piece without ending up in mental institution one must have a good sense of humor. It helped tremendously during my long life. And now I am finding it even more imperative to have it and use it. And trying to find something funny in every situation and also laugh at yourself.
My experiences with doctors, nurses and other medical personnel, who when you meet them are just professionals doing their job and are usually aloof and do not appear to show any empathy, and the atmosphere is very formal; all of a sudden if you interject humor in your conversation becomes more relaxed and caring.
When after the operation I have told my surgeon that he always has to wear blue because I found him to look so handsome in his surgeon dark blue overalls; it produced a chuckle and a smile.
When I make funny remarks about myself we all (nurses in hospitals) laugh and the tension, the impersonal attitude changes. When I said: "No boobs, no hair, no teeth" and then produced and demonstrated a special bras, a wig and a denture - everybody was hysterical and I got a lot of compliments.
I want to share one humorous experience with my trip to special bra shop. A very lovely lady
gave me a bras with one pocket in which you put a silicon replica of your removed breast. I took the bras in my hand and made a double take it weighted a "ton", it was so heavy, and the shop owner explained that it was the same weight as my natural breast. Well ladies that is one way to reduce! No wonder when their weighted me in doctors office I was 8 pounds lighter. That is the way to go. On a more serious note I want to tell you that it was a difficult task to find that special bras shop. I went to American Cancer Society on the Internet, but they directed me to shops in Manhattan. And only by the word of mouth from somebody who new somebody I found that wonderful shop in my own backyard in Glen Head, L.I. (Lillys Bra & Wig shop)

Angels

Due to your new perception of the world and self you notice things which you did not noticed before. In time of grief and stress your eyes open differently. You notice that you are sent a challenge, often a painful one, but right besides it you are sent family members that care, friends and regular "angel" aspects are emerging from these people.
My in-laws, starting with my daughter-in-law, her parents are so full of kindness and consideration.
My own grandson, a typical boy, who does not like to show affection too much - all of a sudden is showing his inner warmth and care for his old"baba". His eyes light up when he visits me, he hugges me and tries to help in any way he can (gives me massages etc).
A very tough (on the outside) lady from my parish, with whom I was not particularly close, calls almost everyday to find how I am doings; brings home cooked delicacies and makes me laugh, tells me stories about her mother experiences with her breast cancer that she conquered (but she died last year from another disease), takes me to the cemetery where her mother and my husband are buried, a.s.o...
An older gentleman with prostate cancer and many personal problems with his children, who used to help my husband when I was working - calls every day, takes care of the grass for me, takes me to doctors, hospitals, etc.
Couple of ladies from my parish take me shopping, to theater and musical performances or just walking in the park...
Some e-mail me constantly, some call...
I feel that all these people are angels and thank God for them; I am so blessed

Family and Friends

I lost my beloved husband (of 32 years) in 2002. And just like then it is so important to have family and friends around you. They do not have to say anything, just be there and may be listen to what you have to say. It is important and heartwarming to feel that people care and are in your corner; whether you lost your husband or discovered a dangerous disease. Especially if you, like I, are living alone; you get depressed; there is no immediate close relative that leaves with you that you can share your concerns with. And you are blessed if you have family and friends. I will share my uplifting stories with you a little later.
New Perception
I always thought that there is so much diseases and suffering in the world; you only have to open newspapers or listen to news or follow the lives of persons you know. So when I discovered that I have cancer my question was: Why not me, I am not immune!... However there may be a reason and I would like to find it. I believe in God and after a while I realized that one possible reason could be that He sends us something, perceived by us, as horrible, to teach us that the only help we can obtain comes from Him and nobody else. Contemplating over my life I always wanted to be in charge, do what I wanted or deemed necessary and now "Oops" there is not much (actually nothing) that I can do. Then comes acceptance and a beautiful prayer: "Thy will be done!..."(that is part of Lord's prayer) and you finally realize how powerful these words are. You take care of this situation and let me do what You want me to do.

Battery of Tests

Now the wound is healing and the oncologist starts to work: reviews all the pathology reports and orders a battery of tests. They want to be sure that the cancer did not travel anywhere else.
First MRI of the remaining breast; because even if the mammogram did not show any lumps there - only MRI test can definitely pinpoint anything suspicious there. Thank God mine was clear.
Then bone scan is conducted to see if cancer has spread to the bones. You are put on the table, have to lye without moving and you are guided throughout a tunnel. but the tunnel is not close to your head, so it is not claustrophobic, it takes half an hour.Again lucky - no indication of cancer spread.
Then PET of the whole body. They inject a special radioactive dye into your vein, you wait for an hour and then they take x-rays while you are moving throughout a tunnel; it takes about 30 minutes. Before the test they take the sugar level in your blood since you are not supposed to take your pills in the morning before the test. My sugar level was acceptable and no spread was discovered.
I would like to share an important point. If you are embarked on this journey of hospitals and tests prepare the following:
1. A List of the medicines you are taking every day; names. dosage and at what time you take it.
2. A List of all the operations you ever had; where; what was the diagnosis.
3. A List of all medicines that you are allergic to; even if it only stomach ache or nausea.
4. Prepare a medical proxy, signed by two witnesses.
Make plenty of copies of each list and proxy so that when they ask you all these questions you can attach copies instead of remembering while you are under stress.
It is also a good idea to try and remember if anybody in your immediate family had cancer and make a note of it. It is very important for doctors to know it.

Care after the Operation

I have a friend that became my friend in 1945 in high school. I went to her house for the first 5 days after the operation. I think it is very comforting to have someone to talk to and not concentrate on your pain and what will be next. For once I did not feel like eating. If you are of "young age" remember that Medicare takes care of visiting nurse service, if your doctor prescribes it. Now if by any chance you are a diabetic it is very possible that your wound will heal very slowly.
There are also some people who are on special drugs for other diseases whose wounds do not heal fast. I can take the pain as long as they - doctors are not working inside of me; but they prescribe anti pain medicine and it is bearable. After 5 days I went home and managed quite well; it is good to have friends who can drop by and whom you can call. In my case because of my controlled diabetes I developed infection at the site of my wound. My operation was on 24th of July and I still (Oct. 13) have discharge from the wound which prevents me to have another small operation for installation of infusion port (for chemo therapy).

How I Discovered my Breast Cancer

On radio they repeat "that every three (3) minutes in USA a woman is diagnosed with breast cancer", a very sobering news - that is why I decided to write my blog.

waking up
On June 1st, 2008, I woke up with a redness and soreness on my right breast. It was also bleeding from the nipple. I went to a medical station doctor (because my doctor was not available)who gave me antibiotics and gently told me: "I am afraid it may be cancer". The redness, soreness and bleeding stopped after couple of days; I went to my family doctor who looked at my breast and started to call an oncologist and a surgeon immediately, telling me "Katie I am afraid it is cancer". I have to confess that this good doctor for six(6) long years urged me to have mammogram done, but stubborn me postponed it - because after loosing my husband in 2002 I really did not care about my health too much.

mammogram
I was sent to the hospital for mammogram, which has shown tumors, not one but 3; echo gram was also done, then I was scheduled for biopsy.
biopsy
Being extremely afraid of pain, I was petrified, but had to have it done for proper diagnosis and location. Well I hope my experience will help someone. Biopsy is a piece of cake; you feel a little prick and then no more pain. The biopsy confirmed the diagnosis and I was told to schedule the operation.
sharing information

I am a peoples person and do not hide what is happening to me; so when I went to my church, during coffee hour I was telling my story to my friends. I am glad that two ladies who did not go regularly to have their mammogram done went after listening to me.
meeting with surgeon
Ask as many questions as you want; feel inside if you are at ease with the doctor; see if he is willing to spend time and answer all your questions and concerns; talk to people who were operated by him; read about your cancer (by now you got the preliminary diagnosis) on internet - "American Cancer Society" is a good start. Talk to people who had breast cancer and find as much as possible from them - what to ask, what to watch out for.

First I had an appointment with a surgeon who told me he will do the removal of tumors only or lumpectomy; but I thought it would be prudent to cut out the whole breast. He reserved his judgment till the operation; it seems there is a new test available now. Before the operation they inject the affected breast with blue dye this dye travels to your lymph nodes and colors only the ones that have cancer cells. The injection before the operation is uncomfortable but one realizes that it has to be performed.
operation
Before the operation my surgeon discovered that four (4) lymph nodes were affected or had cancer cells. So he agreed with my intuitive feeling and decided to perform mastectomy or removing the whole (right) breast and additional four lymph nodes. Out of eight lymph nodes removed four were subsequently found to have cancer cells, proving that the dye test was correct. The operation went smoothly; after it I did not feel too uncomfortable, but rather tired.

Usually patients go home after two days, but my surgeon and my family doctor decided to keep me four days.
after operation
Besides feeling tired, nauseated, the leakage from the tubes that are placed in the place where the breast was is the most annoying issue. It leaks around the tubes, which are small in diameters (there are two) - so all your garments are wet and you have to change them frequently. A good advise is to wear 100% cotton because it allows the air to circulate.